“By the Beard of Zeus!” I cranked on the motor with my pipe wrench… Nothing. I could almost visualize the $1000 going down the toilet if I couldn’t get this compressor working again. The fine print was so small, and yet, it was about to cost me big time. Whereas most of the compressors I installed in my pipe-fitting days were oil-less, this one happened to require oil; it was now seized. I cranked on it one last time… sputter… sputter… and the whurl of the motor kicked in. I finally exhaled. In truth, I was muttering a lot under my breath, trying to contain my language of frustration.
The tongue is like that fine print, although it’s small it can have a large effect on us. It can destroy relationships, reputations, and our character. Coarse language can indicate a lot when it comes out, even when frustrated (like wrecking a $1000 machine).
If you struggle with swearing or pseudo-swearing (similar sounding words), and you’re looking to regain some self-control but need a little release when frustrated, might I suggest some fun alternatives? Instead of the usual vocab list, try some Ancient Greek references, He-Man quotes, or maybe a even a Lord of the Rings quip!
Here’s five of my favorite salutations for life’s little surprises:
“Snakes of Medusa” (Greek Mythology): works well when you forget the paddles for your boat.
“By the Staff of Gandalf that was close!” (Lord of the Rings): the next time a salami sandwich falls from a workmen’s lunchbox as you pass a construction site, nearly missing you.
“Maguro Maki!” (Sushi): You can say that again! Mustard all over your favorite blouse. Sushi menus deliver a great meal, and a bit of relief.
“Great Hammer of Thor!” (The Avengers): You may have lost at Settlers of Catan, but you’ve provided much needed humor in a tense atmosphere.
“NO! By the Power of Greyskull!” (He-Man): You didn’t just flush your wallet down the toilet again did you?
I’m sure you’ve already thought of better ones, so, it’s your turn. Keeping it clean, we want to hear your ideas in the comment box.
By Scott Roy